As Chuck Grassley said last summer, "Grandma should be worried." But, of course, any old person should be worried about his/her last illness. You are completely right that our inability as a society to know when to accept that has become horrendously expensive.
Grandma's going to die. No health care system is going to stop that.
The question is does she die next week and we spend $10K keeping her comfortable?
Or is she going to die in 4 weeks, have no idea who she or anyone around her is, and we're going to spend $350K giving her 3 extra weeks of life that she has no idea she lived?
But either way, at the end of the day, Grandma is dead.
That's why the health care system is broke. Everything else is a red herring.
Neither Obama or the GOP dare address this problem.