You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch: Corrupt a Wish Foundation

WE HAVE A WINNER!!!!!! that is impossible to do!!!!!

Granted, meet Mrs. Smith your undertaker.

I wish I had my lumber back.

Sting wrote:I wish I knew how to find a decent woman that didn't also have the propensity to drive me nuts.

Granted. But you accidentally blew her up with helium instead of air and she floated away.

I wish I could teleport to work instead of driving.

Oops. Too late on the woman.

Richard S. wrote:I wish I had my lumber back.

Granted. Your genie is hard of hearing and you have your lumberjack.
I still wish I could teleport to work instead of driving.

Granted the transporter just beamed you up to the Borg You will now be assimilated.

I wish my kids would do their chores without having to be told.

Granted, But now they're all grown up moved out and you sit there all alone thinking about the good ole days when the kids were younger and you spent all day telling them to do their chores.
I wish coal was the same price in New Hampshire as it is in Penn.
Tom

Sting wrote:I wish I knew how to find a decent woman that didn't also have the propensity to drive me nuts.

HAHAHAHAHAH that's why I'm a lonely single old pathetic bastard.

Now: Granted! Coal is the same price but they passed a law requiring a coal license, a coal permit, a stove permit, and require a $50,000 CO2 scrubber on your chimney.

I wish I was working for people that appreciated me...

Granted, you are now a dancer in a gay bar!!

I wish there was a magic cure for back pain.

Granted, you are getting a realingment down at the gay bar . I wish christmas would be done already.

AA130FIREMAN wrote:Granted, you are getting a realingment down at the gay bar

WOW, tough crowd in here!

ceccil wrote:

AA130FIREMAN wrote:Granted, you are getting a realingment down at the gay bar

WOW, tough crowd in here!

In the spirit of christmas, I'll be Nice. Granted, you are getting a back massage down at the gay bar by your life partner using a tube of ben gay while sippin' a jolly rancher. I still wish christmas would be done already.

Granted! Christmas is done! So is Easter and Groundhog Day and Passover and Halloween... Effective immediately, all holidays are forever banned.

I wish I didn't need a stronger pair of reading glasses.

Granted. I told you to stop doing that or you'll go blind. now look what you've done.

I wish I had more money.

Granted. You have tons more. Now you don't know who your real friends are.

I wish my computer would type directly from my thoughts without need for a keyboard and finger coordination.

Granted, but it's new name is "WIFE" 4.0, it also logs your every move and prints out a list of chores every morning.
I wish i didn't have to go out in the cold garage later today and change the leaking radiator hose on my pickup.