Thank you all for your care.
Well... the bus rolls on... but the road is getting bumpy. Marty is losing weight steadily now, around 3 pounds a week. Some days she'll eat enough to keep a human alive, but most days she doesn't eat enough to keep a parakeet flying. Her knees are hurting a lot & it's difficult for her to walk. Just an hour ago she asked "How come I feel so lousy". I answered "I think it's difficult to see your husband about to turn 60." That provoked a small smile. My birthday is in four weeks. She says she wants to be here for that, and also for her birthday, July 8th. In all honesty... she may or may not see those dates. That's all God stuff for sure, but we humans do have some control. Sometimes a dying person will make a deliberate decision to stop drinking. Marty's not doing that, but, she is starting to lose her need to drink. It comes a point where you simply are not thirsty.
We have had good days. Last week Marty & Eloise went to "Surry Gardens", a greenhouse about 30 miles from here. They brought back a bunch of things in pots & each day are planting some. Marty & I went to "South camp" for a few hours last week too. She made it down the stairs & spent an hour puttering around. We ate lunch on the deck & held hands. We watched birds & listened to the loons. After lunch she found energy & swept the floor. She had her rollator (wheeled walker). She's sweep a bit, sit & rest a bit. I ripped the shower valve out.....some idiot forgot to drain it last Fall & it froze & broke. We stopped on the way home & looked at headstones. We are thinking of doing something different.... we've been looking for a 3 foot roundish boulder. We may or may not... thinking of finding the perfect rock, then having a side cut, polished & engraved. But...we might go with a "normal" head stone. Some of the jet black ones are pretty.
My girls were up to visit. They came Sat for a few hours & Monday for a few more. They shared tears with Marty. As they were leaving I asked, if it was possible, would they want to be here when Marty drew her last breath. It surprised me a bit, but they said yes. So....when the sad time draws near, if possible, I'll let them know & they'll try & make the trip. That day, that moment in time.... it's a full boat of emotions. It's a blessing and a chore rolled into one. It's tears & joy, mixed in an odd way. We hate it, we love it. It's a privilege. Ohh, crap, now I'm rambling. Put the bus in gear.... roll on.