Marty's Bus

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: 2001Sierra On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 6:45 pm

Freddy, May you find comfort in knowing Marty is no longer suffering, and her pain is now gone. She is in a place that is free of lives many burdens. She will touch you many times in some of the most unusual ways and times. I found you where an exceptional person dealing with all the grief, and struggles these times bring. You both are an inspiration to us all.
God bless you and your family.
Kevin
Last edited by 2001Sierra on Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
2001Sierra
 
Hot Air Coal Stoker Stove: Keystoker 90 Chimney vent
Coal Size/Type: Rice
Other Heating: Buderus Oil Boiler 3115-34
Stove/Furnace Model: Keystoker 90 Chimney Vent

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: scalabro On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 6:54 pm

Deepest sympathy Freddy.

You are a strong man indeed.

God Bless you and Marty has her wings.
scalabro
 
Baseburners & Antiques: Crawford 40, PP Stewart No. 14 in the works.
Coal Size/Type: Stove, Anthracite.
Other Heating: Oil fired, forced hot air.

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: newbie in ny On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 7:47 pm

Freddy,
Like so many others that have posted prior to this, I too am so very, very sorry for your loss.The strength and dignity that the two of you had throughout Marty's bus ride was incredible. Take comfort in knowing that you and Marty had 32 wonderful years, many memories and much love that you shared not only together but with so many others. In her final few months she was taken care of by some wonderful hands but is now in another pair of wonderful hands. Bless you for taking such good care of her while she was here and know now that she will still be receiving the same. God Bless
newbie in ny
 
Hot Air Coal Stoker Furnace: Keystoker 160
Coal Size/Type: Rice/Anthracite


Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: Cap On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 8:30 pm

Hi Freddy,
May peace be with you, family & friends at this time. You are a wonderful person and I am grateful to know you if only thru our online weekly discussions.
Cap
 
Hand Fed Coal Boiler: Harman SF 250, domestic hot water loop, heat accumulator

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: Coalfire On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:10 pm

Freddy, not much more I can add. You are in our families prayers.


Eric
Coalfire
 
Hand Fed Coal Stove: DS Machine 96K btu Circulator
Coal Size/Type: Nut

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: warminmn On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:23 pm

Freddy,
I am very sorry for your loss. Marty is being watched over by angels now until you arrive.
warminmn
 
Hand Fed Coal Stove: Chubby Junior, Efel Nestor Martin
Coal Size/Type: nut and stove anthracite. Soft coal
Other Heating: wood

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: SMITTY On: Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:26 pm

Aw man .... I need to check in here more often. :( Very sorry Freddy. It's been a heck of an adventure for the bus and all aboard. God will take the driving duties from here.

Every day I can feel the presence of those around me who have since passed - it's a good feeling knowing that, in the end, everything is going to be just fine.

I'm sure you & Marty made God smile more than once with your deeds - you were faithful servants, and will be rewarded for your service.

We're all here for you if you need anything.

God Bless you Freddy - you made the most of the time you both had, which I'm certain eased her suffering more than you know. God couldn't ask for a better example of a GOOD human. :)
SMITTY
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: Patriot Coal - custom built by Jim Dorsey
Hand Fed Coal Stove: Harman Mark III (not currently in use)
Coal Size/Type: Rice / Blaschak anthracite
Other Heating: Oil fired Burnham boiler

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: Freddy On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 4:42 am

Thank you all again for your kind words & thoughts, they all help, they do.

I tried so many times in the last 3 days of this bus ride to come here & post a few details. I can't count the times I got three or four words typed & then had to leave. For that I am sorry.

OK.... I wish I could write a book about the last 40 hours of Marty's life but I'm too slow at typing and by the time I got to typing it, I'd have forgotten things. But, I will tell this one slice, and I can promise you, I will never, ever, forget this:

Since Marty was 19 years old she wore false teeth, uppers and lowers. In 32 years I only saw her without her teeth a handful of times (and never a clear view). There were only two times she would remove them. In privacy to clean them and if she was going to barf. When she was nauseous, she's spit them out, I'd wash them while she was puking, and I'd hand them back. She'd put them back in while still leaned over the bucket.
As things progressed and the dying process followed it's due course, Marty started breathing more through her mouth. Meds had been going in mixed with ice cream and as nature has it, her mouth was getting to be a bit yucky. We swabbed with little sponges on a stick with ice water....she liked the cold... but we could only do so much. Her sister Carla suggested we get her teeth and clean them. Seemed like a good idea, so "MARTY, spit your teeth out". She could not hear us. Sitting on the bed, Eloise on one side, me on the other, we helped her sit and Carla went in..... she pried & wiggled, Marty resisted. Finally, she got the uppers out. Eloise went to wash them while Carla kept trying to get the lowers. " Spit those out! You'll feel better if you spit them out!" said Carla. Marty couldn't hear or understand, but Carla kept trying and talking "Come on, you'll feel better". One full minute later Eloise came back with the clean uppers and just as she stepped into the room Carla got the lowers loosened. They rattled once in Marty's mouth, and CHOMP, Marty bit Carla's finger! Carla pulled back, Marty's mouth shut and the lowers clicked back into place. OK, that was enough, we put the clean uppers in and the lowers stayed in place. But....that's not the story..... Here's the story:

Marty's breathing had been strong but labored for hours. Finally, after breathing enough air to climb two mountains her breathing started to slow. Carla had fallen asleep on the couch....we had been taking turns with 5 minute walks or cat naps. For 48 hours at all times someone was holding Marty's hand. You never really know what they might hear or know and we thought maybe Marty didn't want a particular one of us to see her die, so for 5 minutes each hour we took turns leaving for 5 minutes. Cuz Chrissy, Eloise, Carla and myself. There were others in & out, but it was the four of us for the final few hours. When Marty skipped one breath Eloise woke Carla. It's now 11:30 PM or so. Over the course of the next few minutes Marty's breathing became very shallow. We knew the time was close. Tears started dripping off Chris's face. One sniffle from her & we all started having tears well up in our eyes. Marty stopped breathing for one full second. Tears start falling off our cheeks. Marty skips another breath, inhales again and for a few seconds is OK. Then she makes two quick breaths. in,out, in out. We are all bawling. Marty takes one last breath.....her final breath, and, (with my hand to God I am telling the truth) she spit her lower teeth onto the bed!!! Instantly we all started laughing. We laughed so hard I thought we'd coke on our tears. It was like Marty said "You want 'em? HERE, I'm DONE". She sure did it her way, right til the end.

<deep breath> So now.... trigger points bring tears. I'll be OK for a while, then have a sniffle, then be OK for a while, then just bawl for 5 minutes. With minutes to spare I got a quick obituary in today's newspaper. It just gave one line, a photo, and "Full obituary following tomorrow". I will spend however long it takes today to write an obit. Marty wrote one, but it needs so much more. The newspaper puts the obits on line. I'll post a link in case any of you would like to see it.
Freddy
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: Axeman Anderson 130 (pea)
Hot Air Coal Stoker Stove: Reading piece o' junk in the barn (rice)
Coal Size/Type: Pea size, Superior, deep mined

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: gaw On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 6:25 am

Sorry for your loss Freddy. Thank you for sharing. It has been a very educational bus trip.
gaw
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: Keystoker KA-6
Coal Size/Type: Rice from Schuylkill County

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: ricoman2737 On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 6:26 am

Freddy,
I.m very sorry for your lose. You gave your wife very loving support and comfort to the end. Thoughts and prayers to you and yours. John
ricoman2737
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: EFM DF520
Coal Size/Type: Buckwheat
Other Heating: Lennox Fuel Oil boiler as a backup
Stove/Furnace Make: EFM
Stove/Furnace Model: DF520

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: windyhill4.2 On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 6:53 am

Thanks for sharing, Freddy,now you got me crying.I will be praying for you as you travel alone & you will have a long rough,steep stretch ahead. When all the relatives & friends go back home, when life settles back into "normal ",you will be alone,& that is when it will seem impossible to go on.Comfort can be found in reading Gods word & in knowing that He will never leave us alone.I will be looking forward to your coffee posts & will be reminded to pray for you every time i read your posts.This next year in your life will seem longer than the 32 short years you shared with Marty.Life sure does fly by when you can share it with a spouse. My wife & i will be married 38 yrs in august ,hard to believe but the years pass so quickly (time flies by when you are having fun). Sorry for your loss,Freddy , i'll be praying for you .
windyhill4.2
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: 1960 EFM520 installed in truck box
Hand Fed Coal Stove: Crane 404 with variable blower
Coal Size/Type: 404-nut, 520 rice ,anthracite for both

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: samhill On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 7:11 am

Thank You for the post Freddy, I know it wasn't easy I'm afflicted with the same slow typing & what makes it worse is I think a lot faster & sometimes miss a line or two. For myself anyhow after a bit & forgive me for saying but my previous wife's passing became like a weight was lifted off of me. I still had my moments but I certainly had my smiles remembering the good times anyway it may be different for you but it takes time & sometimes help so don't hesitate to ask. Sometimes just a listening ear is all that's needed.
samhill
 
Hot Air Coal Stoker Furnace: keystoker 160
Hand Fed Coal Stove: hitzer 75 in garage
Stove/Furnace Make: keystoker/hitzer
Stove/Furnace Model: koker 160/ hitzer 75

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: coalkirk On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 7:54 am

All our love and support to you Freddy. You are one of the finest men I've never met.
coalkirk
 
Stoker Coal Boiler: Harman VF3000
Coal Size/Type: antrhcite/rice coal

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: Lightning On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 7:59 am

HI Freddy... I admire your strength and courage thru this difficult time. I feel bad for what you have gone thru. I'd also like to add that this thread has helped me answer some of my own difficult personal questions, and for that I am grateful. Take care and may peace be with you..
Lightning
 
Hand Fed Coal Furnace: Clayton 1537G
Coal Size/Type: Nut/Stove Size Mix

Re: Marty's Bus

PostBy: lowfog01 On: Wed Jun 04, 2014 8:08 am

Nothing much I can add that hasn't been posted already. Take care of yourself now, peace be with you, Lisa
lowfog01
 
Hand Fed Coal Stove: Mark II & Mark I
Coal Size/Type: nut/pea