My Stove Talked to Me

I was staring at the coal stove, all hooked up, ready to go,
With coal in basement, I heard a "go,go"
It rocked too and fro, wanting to go...
The temperature outside, six "o"


(you guys do the next several lines, suggest a 6 pack while writing, we'll vote who did the best)

On Donnah............. On Blitzen

To the big rock candy mountain?

Sorry........Not much of a poet (do I win anything?)

I said relax big fella, all in good time -
I’m still outside cutting the grass.
When the temp finally hits 3 9
You’ll have a fire behind that glass

(weak, I know, but I've not had enough coffee yet)

There once was a woman from Nantucket........

Nah........that won't win me any prizes either.

I've got it!!

(clears his throat)

If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker...

It is slick to stick a lock upon your stock...

Or some joker who is slicker....

S'gonna trick you of you liquor...

Though you snicker you'll feel sicker from the shock....

Be a piker though your club mates mock & bicker....

For like brokers round a ticker they will flock...

To your locker full of liquor...

And your stock will vanish quicker....

If you fail to lock your liquor with a lock!

.........................(bows)